The odds

So I am watching a trashy daytime talkshow called, “Maury”.  They are doing paternity testing of everyone denying paternity.  I used to love this show with all of the outrageous drama.  I guess I still do since I am watching it right now on Tivo.  But it has me more confused than angry right now.  How the hell can all of these women just sleep with someone once or twice with a condom and still end up with 5 or 6 kids?  I just want one and I am working my ass of for it.  And I don’t mean to sound elitist, but I waited for the right time when I am employed and happily married in a LTR.  These people have no jobs, no way to afford a place to live let alone diapers.  Why do I feel like I am being punished for making the “right” decisions in life by waiting?  Could I have been 19 and gotten pregnant in a bathroom in the club?  Who knows.  But I was responsible and waited.  We have been trying for 1.5years.  I know that is not as long as so many women who use ART (Artificial Reproductive Technology) so I am not trying to gain sympathy.  But these young women with so many shocking surprise pregnancies.  They have no idea who the father of their child is.  Don’t get me wrong, before I met my husband, I had slept with my fair share of guys, but never in such a short time span.  Do these girls even know that you only ovulate about one day a month.  What are the odds!?  Sigh, sorry to complain.  I know life isn’t fair.  I’m not sad, just kind of disappointed by it all.  2nd Clomid Cycle started on Thursday and my first u/s is tomorrow morning.  Maybe I am a bit emotional

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6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. o3broken
    Feb 10, 2013 @ 15:08:23

    Sometimes complaining is all we can do to gain clarity into a situation

    Reply

  2. Cupcakes and Butterflies
    Feb 10, 2013 @ 23:20:33

    This tought has crossed my mind as well. There are no word for how frustrating it is. I take comfort in knowing that I’m not the only one whos mind this has crossed. 🙂

    Reply

  3. Thumbalina
    Feb 11, 2013 @ 23:00:52

    HA! I vent about the same issue ALL the time! Here I am, temping and peeing on OPK sticks, dealing with the nightly hot-flashes of Clomid, and watching these women fire out kids left and right! We waited until we were financially stable. Three years of marriage in, and still nadda. I get pretty bitter about it…… I try not to, but when I see my irresponsible friends post pictures of their new ultra sounds from one night stands, I can’t help but click “unfriend”…. Sorry to just drop in and vent on your wall, lol, but this post sounds just like me!

    Reply

    • jaygore
      Feb 11, 2013 @ 23:27:50

      Thank you! Glad to know that I am not the only one! I always feel guilty for thinking this way but after each BFN the resentment grows whenever I see someone take it for granted. I see women screaming at their kids in public or just flat out ignoring an adorable and inquisitive child at a restaurant table. I want to run up to them shake them and tell them how much their dumbfound luck pisses me the hell off. And there is my vent 🙂

      Reply

  4. Persephone
    Feb 14, 2013 @ 06:33:45

    Had to comment on this – Totally! I have literally just deleted someone from my life (known her over half my life) because at the age of thirty, she knows my TTC journey and yet feels happy to announce her third pregnancy to a new guy she’s known a little over a year. As they both sit in her council flat doing sweet FA. I am fed up with having done everything “right” (marriage, home, job etc) and having to still pay for this ‘friend’ to have children and do nothing with her life. I can’t opt out of paying taxes, but I can stop being her friend! Now I’ve vented, gonna look at more of your blog 🙂

    Reply

  5. Persephone
    Feb 14, 2013 @ 06:36:29

    Reblogged this on Persephone's Posts and commented:
    I have to reblog this as I found it at the exact right moment (okay maybe two nights ago when I got THE TEXT was the exact moment), but a few days later I’m still angry and stumbled upon this. I avoid these shows to avoid seeing these people, but had been happy to continue having them in my life. Not anymore, I will cut them out of my real life, too. Good Bye!

    Reply

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